Top tips: When one click turns into an internet side quest
Top Tips is a weekly column where we highlight what’s trending in the tech world today and explore practical ways to navigate it. This week, we're following the journey from "I'll just check one thing" to "How did I end up here?"
Every internet side quest starts the same way: with a perfectly reasonable objective.
Nobody wakes up and thinks, Today, I'd like to spend 45 minutes learning about medieval sewer systems.
No. The plan was simple.
Check the weather.
That's it.
Just the weather.
But somewhere between opening your phone and finding out whether you need an umbrella, you've watched a video about the world's smallest apartment, learned that octopuses have three hearts, and somehow ended up reading a Reddit thread from 2018.
The weather can wait. Apparently, understanding the history of vending machines in Japan has become the priority.
We act like we have iron-clad self-control and then get emotionally kidnapped by a thumbnail that reads, Scientists discovered something strange under Antarctica.
Because deep down, humans have always had a weakness for one more thing.
One more story.
One more fact.
One more video.
One more click.
The internet simply industrialised the process.
1. Beware the while I'm here trap
This is where most side quests begin.
You open LinkedIn to check a message.
While I'm here, I'll just see what's new.
This innocent sentence has probably cost humanity an impressive number of hours.
Three posts later, someone is discussing the future of AI, someone else has announced they're thrilled to share something, and you've somehow become emotionally invested in a debate you didn't know existed three minutes ago.
The funny thing is that every click feels like part of the plan. It's only when you look back that you realize the plan changed about fifteen minutes ago.
2. The you might also like problem
The internet is essentially a giant room full of people waving fancy objects.
Every platform has recommendations, suggested videos, and trending topics.
And to be fair, some of them are genuinely fascinating.
The problem is that your brain treats every interesting thing like a limited-time opportunity.
What if this video changes my life?
Chances are...it won't.
It's a seven-minute compilation of unusual parking spaces.
3. Curiosity takes the wheel
You think you're choosing content.
The algorithm thinks that's adorable.
After years of watching what people click, pause on, rewind, and share, recommendation systems have become frighteningly good at knowing what keeps us around.
Human curiosity is a wonderful trait.
It's also the reason millions of people know that sharks are older than trees.
4. The quest log is full
Internet side quests don't come with a finish line. There's always another article to read, another video to watch, and another rabbit hole waiting around the corner.
The trick is knowing when to close the tab, leave a few mysteries unsolved, and return to whatever you were doing before the internet convinced you that becoming an expert on shipwrecks was essential.
Because unlike the internet, your time does have an ending.
A final plot twist
The truth is, the internet didn't create side quests. It simply discovered that humans are incapable of ignoring something interesting.
So what did we learn from all of this?
Probably not the weather.
Instead, we learned about octopuses, shipwrecks, Antarctica, and maybe even vending machines.
The weather itself was lost somewhere around the third click.
Which is probably the most accurate summary of an internet side quest you'll ever find.